Lost and confused!! Jun 13, 2016 13:23:12 GMT -5 via mobile
Post by trueheart08 on Jun 13, 2016 13:23:12 GMT -5
Hello everyone, Ive been married for 12yrs but togerher for 20yrs with 4 kids. I came out to my H 8yrs ago with the expectations of him leaving me. Instead he told me it was OK with him as long as it wasn't a man! And of course he said, " I don't mind as long as I can be involved every now and then. " Now I have been with women before he just never knew it 8yrs before I even told him. I told him I needed a WOMAN/GF! He wasn't leaving me so to keep peace I agreed to get on these crazy dating sites. He was told I didn't want a fling thing with any woman!!! Didn't feel right to me so I wished I had kepted it a secret! Well a single woman contacted me for 3wks straight and I never replied because I was nervous. I was like who would really want to deal with a MW W/KIDS..Thinking we meet never see each other again but she ACCEPTED my baggage and willing to deal with my H to be with me. Telling me she didn't care about me being married. That she understands it's for my kids. Its been 6yrs now..she left me one time after 3yrs before moving to another state.. left her live in GF for 2yrs and came back to me! (I'M STILL MARRIED) over those 2yrs she has contacted me.. 1yr ago moved in with my family!!! Yes we have all been together but I hated it! We just wanted to be together..she left again after being here 6months said she was getting jealous and wanted me to herself. All I have done and can do is accept and respect decision because I am married.she had a H but left him to live her life as a lesbian without any kids. I have kids,still young 11&10 yrs old. She still contacts me even tho she keeps telling me she loves me and can't live W/out me! I love her with all my heart but I feel I can't hurt my family.My H and I argue a lot, but he is the one bringing in $$while I sit at home. My fear is i haven't worked in yrs. I don't want someone else taking care of me and mine. I am so lost and confused...I need advice!